We all remember the famous lines from Bridget Jones’s Diary:
Bridget: Ah, introduce people with thoughtful details. Perpetua, this is Mark Darcy. Mark's a prematurely middle-aged prick with a cruel-raced ex-wife. Perpetua's a fart-ass old bag who spends her time bossing me around... Maybe not.
Perpetua: Anyone going to introduce me?
Bridget: Ah, Perpetua. This is Mark Darcy. Mark's a top barrister. He comes from Grafton Underwood. Perpetua's one of my work colleagues.
Perpetua: Oh, Mark, I know you by reputation of course.
Mark: (Natasha arrives) Ah, Natasha. This is Bridget Jones. Bridget, this is Natasha. Natasha is a top attorney and specialises in family law. Bridget is in advertising and used to play naked in my paddling pool.
As the above shows, an introduction can make or break a conversation; the same applies in writing when introducing your paper. The ‘Bridget’ quote makes intros look easy and fun, but also highlights that what we want to say and what we actually have to say are two very different things. You’d think it was pretty straight forward; surely all you’ve got to do is say, ‘hello, this is what I want to argue and this is how I am going to argue it’. It sounds simple, yet it causes so many of us so much pain. Something so difficult must have a really complex definition; let’s check the OED:
introduction (noun) a thing that introduces another, such as a section at the beginning of a book.
Err… is that it?
‘A thing that introduces another’, so for this particular blog I would say:
This blog is going to explain how to write an excellent introduction. It will include helpful tips and two examples; one of what not to do, and one of what you should definitely do.
Your introduction needs to:
- Inform your reader what your essay is about and clearly state your argument (if there is one);
- Briefly summarise your entire essay. Readers hate sudden surprises where the writer brings in a topic that has not previously been mentioned;
- Be catchy, clear and concise;
- Pack a punch!
Avoid:
- Asking rhetorical questions;
- Making broad statements.
Only use quotations in an introduction if they are absolutely necessary (as we will see below); try to save them for the body of the assignment and use them to support your argument.
If an introduction is not clear and concise, the reader will be completely confused about what you’re writing about. Note: this is NOT good if the reader is also marking your assignment…you will have instantly lost valuable marks.
We’ve all been confused as readers, even when the intro is fabulous!
Example 1
This is what NOT to do (this was a first draft of an essay and as such, this introduction was not used in the final version!)
Understanding Fantasia can be very challenging to begin with, mainly because of Djebar’s choice to incorporate personal viewpoints with historical accounts. There are many subjects addressed in Fantasia: An Algerian Cavalcade, with the theme of voices being very dominant. ‘Djebar uses oral history to give voice to surviving heroines…of the Algerian revolution, and allows them to tell their own stories’ (Mortimer, cited in Ghaussy, 1994, p.458), in turn providing an alternative to the French account of events which has claimed to be the truth. This essay will highlight some of the various voices that are incorporated into Djebar’s novel and show the importance of the voices that are uncovered.
Analysis of Example 1
Firstly, this person has included a quote. Whilst it fits with the rest of the sentence, it doesn’t really add much to the introduction. It would be better off used elsewhere in the body of the essay, where it will probably pack more of a punch. This intro is also very broad and doesn’t get to the point of what the main focus of the assignment is. ‘This essay will highlight some of the various voices that are incorporated into Djebar’s novel and show the importance of the voices that are uncovered.’ – the final sentence needs to be punchy and lead into the next paragraph. You need to catch the readers’ attention and leave them wanting to read on. This sentence definitely does not; what are the voices? Why have they been uncovered? What is the point of them? You may not have a huge number of words to play with for your intro, but you don’t want to leave your reader asking questions about what they are going to be reading. Remember: reading assignments shouldn’t be hard work. If it is, you’ll have lost their attention and therefore lost the marks.
Example 2
This is how you do it…
This introduction is taken from a critical essay exploring Martin McDonagh’s screenplay In Bruges:
In Bruges(IB) ‘has what appears to be a sincerely intended core and what can ultimately be described as a kind of message’ (King, 2011, p.143); it ‘addresses themes…including eschatology, sin, suicide, war, the nature of suffering and “the capacity of men to ‘long’ for something different” (Brown, Augustine of Hippo, p. 322)’ (O’Brien, 2012, p.94). It is a ‘pastiche’ (McDonagh, 2008, p.14) of Roeg’s Don’t Look Now, has ‘elements of [Augustines’s] theological epic City of God’ (O’Brien, 2012, p.93) and, as Lonergan and SΓΈrneson separately note, draws comparisons to Pinter’s The Dumb Waiter. Clearly, much has been written about the key ideas and concerns McDonagh explores in IB. More specifically, scholars and critics have explored whether these concerns can be better understood through intertextual references. This analysis, therefore, will examine not only McDonagh’s use of intertextuality, but, his interplay between fantasy and reality; questioning whether anything can be truly original. It will argue that the intertextual references are deliberate, emphasising the concept that art creates suffering, thus suffering creates art; or put simply: violent images breed violent acts; the two go hand in hand.
Analysis of Example 2
Here, the writer has begun with a string of quotations; this allows her to express some of the films concerns, whilst also introducing her argument: ‘more specifically, scholars and critics have explored whether these concerns can be better understood through intertextual references’. She then introduces what ‘this analysis’ will look at and what ‘[i]t will argue’. She is clear, concise and to the point. Therefore, the reader expects this paper to focus on how McDonagh’s continual use of intertextuality is deliberate in order to explore a blur between fantasy and reality.
Having written a clear introduction, you as the writer have not only established the argument for your reader, but also for yourself. So when you’re bogged down on page 5 and slowly losing the will to live, refer back to your awesome introduction for inspiration. If what you’re babbling about doesn’t fit with your intro, then hit the delete button. (No, not to delete the awesome intro, but to delete the babble on page 5.)
Trust us, the introduction is the key to a brilliant essay and BCC-Editing can help you to achieve your brilliance!
